I had a bit of a ride this weekend. For some reason, I seem to struggle and then to come out of it further ahead than I was just before the struggle started. Yesterday was tough. I don't miss what was wrecked. I miss what it represented to me. And today, when I look in my mind at what it really was, I don't have that skin-crawling feeling of horror, at least not all the time. This is progress. The truth was what it was. I didn't see it, or at least all of it, for a very long time. And when I did, I left. The end of the bad ride. 


I am dragging my feet somewhat as I approach my new destination. I am trying to figure out why. I may need help figuring it out as I have noticed it for a couple weeks now and haven't come up with anything. 


I am learning, however, to do the things I want to do and to have fun. I took Tuesday off 2 weeks ago and went to the beach with a friend. I am taking Tuesday and Wednesday off to see my favorite band and to play tourist in Boston with 2 friends. I am not fretting over not getting things done since there is no deadline - pressing or otherwise - that I have to meet. 


So, I need to finish the cleaning up here where I am now, move to the next destination, get settled into that and then start building MY park. What rides do I want in it? Who do I want to attract? Who stays and who goes? Big questions ahead. Which is my motivation to clean up so I can start answering them. I think the answers will be more enjoyable than this clean up.